Formula for Sexsessful Marriage Revealed
Elysian Acres – Marital stability, it turns out, is simple: it’s a matter of keeping score. Quarrels should be subtracted from the number of times the loving couple couple. If the number is positive, the marriage is on sounder footing than one where there are more quarrels than lovemaking. Lovemaking – quarrels = (marital bliss/hell) […]
US Politics
LaPierre Ambushed While Countering Obama’s Gun Proposals
LAS VEGAS – NRA Executive Vice President Wayne LaPierre’s counter attack against President Obama’s call for tighter gun regulations came under withering return fire from surprise questioners who ambushed the gun lobby’s point man at a press conference here on Wednesday. LaPierre called the conference to counter the president’s call for a ban on civilian […]
The World
Obama, Karzai Agree War “Didn’t” Occur
WASHINGTON – Presidents Obama and Karzai agreed in a breakthrough meeting this week that the war in Afghanistan “didn’t” happen. The relationship between the two presidents has been frosty, even during the warmest of times between the two leaders and the most recent meeting of allies was no exception: “We didn’t anticipate that you would […]
Kremlin Flooded by Tsunami of Liquidity
MOSCOW - French actor Gerard Depardieu's defection to Russia to cash in on a 13% flat-rate, income tax is sparking an international migration that could cause an imbalance in the world's monetary system. Sources tell ZxZ that Mitt Romney, Syrian President Bashar al-Assad, and even corporate personages are following in Depardieu's footsteps. But even more startling is news that entire nations … Please read more here...
New Line of Mausoleums Means You Don’t Have to Say ‘Goodbye’ to Departed
HADES - Gods of the underworld recently met here with funeral industry leaders to develop a strategy that will enable bereaved to indefinitely hold onto the corpse of their lost loved ones. "We see a once in a lifetime opportunity here to unite the deceased with the bereaved in a relationship that lasts long after crossing over to the other side," said Gomez Adams, spokesman for the Morticians … Please read more here...
Tea Party Responds to ZxZ Exposé With ‘Yes’ List
DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE - Stung by a ZxZ exposé of the Tea Party's campaign to purge the ranks of the Republican party of compromisers, the right wing faction Sunday unveiled a hastily compiled test of questions that prospective candidates must be able to answer with a "yes." "We don't want to be perceived as a cadre of reactionary obstructionists who only say, 'no,'" said the Red Queen, who now … Please read more here...
